A Spaniard might say “Necesito ayuda” while a Frenchman might say “J’ai besoin d’aide.” If one found themselves in a precarious position in Italy, it would be wise to utter “Ho bisogno di aiuto!” Somehow, I don’t know this phrase, as anyone close to me would confirm that these words are the last to leave my mouth. I do have some sterling qualities, but this is not in my current repertoire. I wish I were taking journalistic hyperbole when stating that this is a crippling character flaw within me, but I’m not.
I am a humble person, but I enjoy my current station in life. I feel I am at a slight plateau before the huge mountain climb that will take me to the point I have been trained and well groomed for. All the tools are there, the path is out in front of me, but that crippling mentality is a cast iron anchor around my ankle. Eventually I will reach the summit with or without it, but I can’t consciously keep making my climb longer and harder…can I?
“I need help” might possibly be the 3 hardest word phrase for me to string together. In any language, at anytime, in any place, they are the kryptonite to my super strengths*. When I run into a problem, my inner modus operandi goes a little like this:
- “This sucks, how shall I get through/around this”
- Ask for help from an expert? Nope, I’m all set
- “Since asking for help would reveal vulnerabilities or past failures, I must figure this out myself”
- “It’s been (___) hours, lets revert to Step 1 and see what went wrong.
I wholeheartedly admit that, by all accounts, may be (as Bill Cosby once said to his flunking son, Theo) “…the DUMBEST thing I have ever heard…”
The preposterous situations I’ve found myself in are numerous, but usually all borne from holding to the same obstinate philosophy.
The chicken or the egg? What came first, my stubborn reluctance to ask for help, or my obstinate unwillingness to open myself up? These two exist is some sick symbiotic relationship that only exists to hinder my own progress. Chains be broken. I have to open up, I must ask for help, I am imploring myself to be better.
*Super is a relative term.
